Saturday, June 7, 2008

Peaceful Week

This is a picture of Big G holding Teagan, right after she made us my favorite dinner Sunday, after our family fast.
This week has been pretty peaceful. After our good report at the cardio. appt. on Monday it has been "our" normal life here at home. Monday when we got home Teagan was a little out of it from the drugs so we tried to keep him as calm and relaxed as we could, my mom came over so I could nap for a minute after our early morning. We had a few responses to our night nanny ad so I did three interviews that night and guess what we picked one. Her name is Amber and she has done two nights already and will be here tonight and tomorrow night as well. She is really great, I can tell she just loves Teagan already. She is really loving to him and after I gave her a very detailed write-up on how to medically and feeding wise take care of him, she caught on to that too. I hope she sticks around because it is really helping us, especially since Ryan has been sick since last Sunday and hasn't been able to come within 10 feet of Teagan and hasn't been sleeping in our bed. Needless to say we really appreciate her and the care she gives to Teags. And talk about small world, Amber and I went to school together, she is a year older, but we were both in choir. My Mom also figured out Amber's Mom is in her stake and her and her primary presidency sent us a care basket full of goodies while we were in the hospital, talk about answering our prayers. Tues. Cortney graduated and we are so proud of her. The girl who only got one A-, never sluffed and not one tardy, go Jo! So Stacey watched Teagan while we went to dinner to celebrate. On Wednesday G-ma Dee had the night and Grandpa Mason came to help her, he did such a great job and even let her catch a couple of Zzz. My Mom said it was the nicest thing her Dad has ever done for her. In the morning Grandpa made all of us omelets, they were delicious, thanks Grandpa! Last night we went to dinner with Eica & Allana and Levi & Megan to celebrate Allana's b-day, it was fun. Stacey and Em watched the boys. Today me and Mason went to Kung Fu Panda and The Mayan for Sammie's b-day, Teagan stayed home with G-ma Dee and her friend Joye came to help her. We are trying to get use to our new normal and be able to do as many normal things as we possibly can, but it's hard to do anything without Teagan, I look around at all the baby car seats or hear a baby cry out in the movie and all I can think is I wish my baby was hear to cry out. I have a lot of family and friends who are pregnant right now and to be perfectly honest it is really hard for me. Don't get me wrong I wish them all well, I pray that they each have a healthy baby and never have to go through this, but it is just hard to know that they are going to have that perfect healthy baby and I have to prepare for my little guy to have his chest cut open AGAIN. I wouldn't trade Teagan for anyone, but oh how I wish he were healthy. I enjoyed my pregnancy, a part of me really wanted a girl and I couldn't wait for my ultrasound to find out, so much in fact I didn't wait and I went to Fetal Studio. Next time, IF there is a next time and that's a big IF, it won't matter if it's a boy or a girl or even a monkey as long as we can get some good looks at the heart and make sure all it's parts are there. From now on when someone says we don't care what it is so long as it's healthy, I will totally agree. You are probably reading this right now saying this will never happen to me, and I would have said the same thing even three months ago, but how wrong was I... it can and it might, I just want you to know I will be here for you... just like the blogs before me are here for me. It's nice to know you are not alone in this and you read the blogs and tell yourself, if they can do that, then I can definitely do this. Life isn't fair, but we are not alone and when it gets too hard to handle, I believe more now than ever before, He truly does carry you. May our Heavenly Father's blessings pour out upon you and your family is my prayer. Thanks again, keep the faith!


Chelsee said...

I love your honesty.

Kathy said...

Hang in there Brytten, you are such a strong and amazing person.

Anonymous said...

I would just like to shout to the world that I have the two best nephews in the world! Even though Teag is going through this trial I hope Mase still realizes how much I love him! Also thanks Brytt for the shout out! I don't deserve it but it only proves my point even more about you... no matter what, you are always willing to put others before yourself. I love you!

Andrea said...

I can remember so clearly when Andrew was in the hospital, it was probably about a month or so since he had been there and feeling so baby hungry! I was looking at Parents magazine at a cute Johnson and Johnsons ad and thinking how much I wanted to be holding a new baby after having been pregnant for so long! It sounds so strange and it felt so strange. I really had to remind myself that I HAD a baby. My friends that have had healthy babies have always been so concerned with what their child should be doing at their particular age, even I was caught up in it when my first was little. But having a baby that isn't healthy puts things into perspective. Those types of things just don't matter anymore, they will get there when they are ready. I am so glad to hear that things are going well and that his cardio appointment went well.

Andrea Mathis